My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
