You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
someone threw a dead crab at me
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
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