look no pants
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
