What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
