Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
