well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
