It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
please come you make the beer taste better
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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