and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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