i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Randomize
