just tell him i said nine months
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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