OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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