So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You're a waste of cheezeits
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
