i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
4 words: hood of his car
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
