Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
