she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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