why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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