i was rollin on her like bob the builder
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize