Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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