i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
