Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
