i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize