My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
