I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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