Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
nut hugger
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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