Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I understand Curling. That high.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
