yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
