I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
