Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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