Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
