you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
