It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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