So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize