distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
