I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
