bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
