I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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