It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
