My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
