my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
