i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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