you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
