That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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