I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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