Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
