I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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