Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
