thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Randomize
