I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
