Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
