It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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