Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
